Self Esteem

I was hoping to have found some time last weekend to make a post but once again time slipped away.... Damn weekends are way too short now a days... Any who, I am not sure if I had shared this or not but something I have found very disturbing and really haven't given much thought about until last Friday... While at work I was listening to a local radio station (one I had once worked for, not too long ago) 105.7 The Buzzard and about an hour into my shift they played this song.
Yes, you guessed it, it is "Self Esteem" from Offspring. Much like most songs I have memories that I tend to benchmark my life with, but that one in particular has a strong hold on me yet to this day. For when it was released, I was dating? Living with? Had a girl friend? Damn I don't know what the hell it was, except for it was a fucked up relationship nonetheless and that song nailed it right on the head.

I was so stuck in denial it wasn't even funny. Even when I listened to that song it was hitting home, but I didn't want to accept it. Was the sex that great?!?!? To be honest YES it was. I have to admit that she knew what she was doing and she was one of the best fucks of my life. Literally; physically, emotionally, mentally, and financially. She knew what she was doing and was not a fool.

It wasn't until her friend disclosed to me and opened my eyes to everything she was doing behind my back. Here I was thinking (yes, denial) that it was just me and my damn trust issues. Come to find out she had been working as an escort while I was out at work. Needless to say, once I found this out, her shit was out the door and I went directly to the doctors to get my self checked out for every flipping thing. To this day I thank God my results have come up clean.

Now here is a flip side of it all. Obviously many years have now passed since that time. Yet recently I ran into her father and we began to talk (once again God was looking over me). Apparently she is now doing time for killing her last boyfriend with a nine millimeter point blank range. Not just one shot either, according to her father she emptied the clip into this guy.

Well there you go, proof I sure know how to pick them.